Feeling Lost, Lonely, and on the Outside? Respond to the God who Sees
by Teresa(1,457)
Freelance writer/Speaker
This morning I read the following poem. It reminded me of my school days. By the time I graduated from high school, I attended 15 different schools, and was well acquainted with being an outsider. It wasn’t until middle school that I became a pro at finding the kids who were just like me. Unfortunately, some of us never grow out of feeling like an outsider – many times caused by our own actions of shying away from others all together. If this sounds like you or someone you know, read on. I believe you will be as encouraged as I am.
Nose pressed to glass
It was cracked,
Outside looking in
They are there
Always together
Laughter leaking
Me looking in
In the hallway
Between classes
She said hi
Me, looking on
Elections coming
So I’m honored
Nodded only
A candidate's pawn
Wrong sweater
Older skirt
Cousin’s castoffs
Me looking away
Friday mixer
Rhythm records
Invisible me
Sideline sway
Lunch table laughter
Sorry, seats taken
Shoulders slumping
Moving beyond
Silly whispers
Fitting nowhere
In crowd’s cruel
Existence, non
Rude roughhousing
Crass humor
Butt of jokes
Face of red
Bully barking
Fingers flipping
Unjustly jostled
Monday's dread
Parties planned
Classmates going
Invitations passed
Not my desk
Adolescent unkindness
Focused on us
Never a letup
Most grotesque
Gradually I see
Standing there
Hands pressing glass
Outside too
She’s not weird
Who shut the door?
Closed face on
One who’s new
Stammering me
“What’s your name?
Where’d you move from
Glad you came…”
Blinking eyes
A tear or two
“My name’s Sue
Glad to meet you!”
On that day
We had a start
Guileless girls
With broken heart
Friendship deep
Between us grew
Where’d I have been
Without meeting Sue?
(Marijo Phelps – All rights reserved)
The Last verse of this poem is an anthem to my life. Only “Sue” is the God of all creation.
Along life’s path – between marriage and children, and somewhere in between, I still have moments of loneliness; what is my purpose? Does anyone really care about me; do they really understand what I am going through? It’s amazing how while in a good marriage, and a life filled with children and friends, that I can still feel lonely.
Then I remember that God is with me, as a Christian, he never leaves me, his spirit abides in me – the problem is, I have drifted from Him. Life gets busy, and suddenly my lack of fellowship with him brings back those old feelings of being an outsider.
God has many names, but there is one that is most endearing; El Roi (El Raw-Hee), the Hebrew word meaning, the God who sees me.
What an incredible comfort to know that he sees my tears, he sees my loneliness, and he sees my needs. However, it only helps if I reach out and take hold of His hand for comfort. There is an old expression, which says, “God is a gentleman, he will never force himself on anyone”.
If you are reading this as a Christian who has moved away from God, or you are one who has never fully surrendered your heart to Christ –(You might have a religion, but not a living and active relationship with God). I pray you will stop playing religion and develop a living and active relationship with Him today – this moment.
His comfort is only a prayer away. If you need a little prompting, here is one of the prayers I prayed many years ago:
Heavenly Father, thank you for seeing my deepest need – I have been fighting you, I know you are calling me to a relationship with you, but it’s tough coming to you. Partly because I know I have sin in my life and I am afraid you will not accept me if you knew the real me. Then I realized that if you truly are the God who sees me, you already know what it is, and yet you still call to me and you have put people in my life to share your love with me. So today Lord I surrender, I give you all my fears, all my sin, and I accept your love and forgiveness. I don’t ever want to feel like an outsider again, not in my own home, and not with you. I realize now, that you are the only one who can satisfy my every need and I am ready to follow you. In Jesus name, Amen.
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me [Jesus] and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11:28-30
Article submitted Thursday, July 30, 2009 & read 358 times.
Leave Your Comments:
» left by Marijo Phelps from mountain meadow in CO (364 days 18 hours ago.)
Praising God for these insights! SO glad that HE drew us and saved us and loves us....where WOULD we be without Him? MarijoRespond to this comment
» left by Teresa (364 days 7 hours ago.)
Thanks Marijo, and thank you for allowing me to use your poem, I appreciate the inspiration. God is good! This is the second time he brought us together to accomplish a word. Good team work :-)
It is amazing that God would draw us to himself! Thankfully, because if he does not call us, there would be nothing we could do to get his attention. But for sweet grace. I am eternally grateful too! Hugs, Teresa
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