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Lover of My Soul

by Marijo Phelps(180) Red Star


Oh, my Jesus,

You were there all along.

In the writings of my stormy youth

It was You I lost

You I grieved for without knowing it,

You I left behind,

Not some mortal love waning

But my love for You,

The lover of my soul.

And I wondered at my depression,

Not realizing that it couldn't find relief

Without Your saving grace.

I sought to fill up emptiness of soul

With materialistic mirages

Passing people,unrealistic philosophies

And couldn't understand

Why they didn't fit.

Then I grew to " enlightenment " ,

And rejection of the Father.

You were there waiting still

How Your heart must have broken,

Yet You steadfastly loved me.

I compounded unbelief and rejection

With experimentation and exploration

Into the highways of worldly pleasure

And You cried a loving tear

Protecting me - so many times my very life

And me refusing, scorning still.

It must have seemed an eternity

Until I'd tried all there was to try

I'd been so many faces and places

There were no numbers left to count them

Restless, searching, seeking to fill

That awful, gnawing emptiness in my soul,

Yet still I wouldn't seek

But argued, scoffed and ridiculed

Those so weak as to believe in god

To say nothing of a personal savior

Who was crucified, dead, buried

And resurrected for me!

And to know that You waited,

Then forgave me, answered me,

And led me into Your Word-

Saved me, changed me,

Let me see and feel and shine

With Your radiant, fulfilling love

That has filled to overflowing

The God-shaped void

Too long dead empty

Within my longing, longing soul.

I'm Yours, I'm Yours completely

Oh, Jesus, patient lover of my soul!!

 

(C) Marijo Phelps all rights reserved. Use with with proper credits.

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Article submitted Saturday, August 08, 2009 & read 8 times.

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